November 20, 2018 LIFE CHANGES

When I was a kid my grandmother used to whip up this dessert--Ice Box Cookies--all the time. Picture this--old fashioned chocolate wafers--and freshly whipped cream-- frozen--kind of like an oreo--ONLY A THOUSAND TIMES BETTER. I thought I had died and gone to heaven every time we had that treat. It was the best. So--when my kids were little I decided to carry on the tradition. Fast forward 25 years-- IMAGINE MY HORROR WHEN I WENT TO STOP & SHOP THE OTHER DAY AND THE WAFERS WEREN'T THERE. At first I thought they moved the thin-- yellow-- rectangular boxes to another area--BUT NOOO!!!  By this time--I was frantic--so I asked a manager--Who knew exactly what I was looking for. We searched like treasure hunters--every NOOK and CRANNY of the cookie aisle to NO avail. NO NABISCO FAMOUS CHOCOLATE WAFERS!!  It can't be possible. These little gems have been around since 1927-- People have been making Ice box cookies for over 75 years!!! How could they just disappear. Now I'm kind of in a funk--missing my grandmother--missing our tradition. WHAT'S THIS WORLD COMING TOO??  I bet you Benny's would have had them! NO BENNY'S--NO CHOCOLATE WAFERS. Next thing you know we'll be having another PROHIBITION. Sometimes life changes for the better and sometimes not. This is a major theme in Anna Quindlen's new novel Alternate Side. 

Nora Nolan, the main character, lives in New York City with her husband Charlie and 18 year old twins.  They live in a nice neighborhood of old brownstones where  everyone is well off--and everyone knows everyone else's business. They share a handyman, have block parties and gossip about each other while walking their dogs.  After the twins go off to college, Nora and Charlie are suddenly empty nesters. They start to realize that they don't have much in common without their kids around. They also begin to realize that they've changed in ways they could never have imagined over their 25 year marriage. Compromise is an issue, especially when Nora wants to stay in the city and Charlie want to move South. Nora is also more successful than Charlie, and he resents it. This is essentially a story about a neighborhood where everyone looks successful, and happy but that's just the veneer. This is also the story of a long married couple facing a cross roads. Quindlen is a great writer with a keen eye who really hits the nail on the head. She says--there are three kinds of marriages--happy--miserable--or somewhere in between. The key is to find out where you are and recognize that it can change with time. This sad story is about 300 pages or a 3.5 mile run that really makes you reevaluate your life and priorities.