November 7, 2016 SHOULD I STAY OR SHOULD I GO?

Wish I had run the Tarzan Brown 5.5 mile road race yesterday. Not sure why I didn't -- a combination of commitment phobia and a 1:30 start time-- were the reasons I used to justify my laziness. It was a great day to run--nice and cool-- beautiful scenery too. I hate when I talk myself out of things or when I can't make a decision.  It's frustrating to be WISHY-WASHY. I miss many things because of my inability to just say YES. A few friends ran the race and we were chatting about it today and I felt  left out ALL because of my INDECISIVENESS. They were talking splits and clock times and I felt that competitive spirit brewing--and then-- REGRET. I have no one to blame but myself--so I'll take responsibility--try to change--and move on. UGH!  Anyways, I actually just finished a book written by Orhan Pamuk called The Museum of Innocence that is filled with regret.

I picked this novel up a few months ago because the author had won a Nobel Prize for Literature in 2006 for another book entitled Snow, so I figured it must be good. There were many things I loved about this beautifully written book--although  I believe it was 200 pages too long. The story is set in Istanbul around 1975 and the main character, Kemal, is about to be engaged to a young woman named Sibel. Both are from wealthy families and seem to be a good match--until Kemal meets a beautiful retail worker named Fusun. He becomes obsessed with her-- initially believing he can have his cake and eat it too. His engagement is eventually called off which ruins his fiancee's reputation,  and Fusun runs away and marries someone else. Kemal  becomes obsessed with finding Fusun and then spends eight years trying to win her back. During this time, he starts a collection of her possessions in order to feel connected to her because he is not able to be with her or let her go.  This is a story of regret, longing, Turkish societal norms, social class and more. In many ways this novel reminded me of a "Turkish" Great Gatsby--which I loved.  If you enjoy a love story and want to find out what ultimately happens to Kemal and Fusun than read this book. It is a bit of a commitment though--about 500 pages --or an 8 mile run--that any romantic will find hard to put down.