September 18, 2016 DAZED AND CONFUSED

Robot--Lost In Space

Not sure if you remember the old television show--Lost In Space--the Robinson family, Dr. Smith and the Robot who thrashed his arms around spieling "Danger, Danger" or "This does not compute." I am sure THAT I only saw the repeats because I am DEFINITELY NOT THAT OLD--YET. Anyways, there are times that I feel sort of lost in space--or lost in runs to be more specific.  Sometimes when I run, I get lost in thought and forget where I am or where I am supposed to be going. I have also felt this lost feeling during races, especially, if it's a race I have never run--because I don't know the course--and with my commitment phobia--I never have time to check it out beforehand. I have only felt REALLY LOST while running once and it happened during a race that I ran over the summer. The strange thing is ---I have run the race at least 10 times. I'm not sure what happened--a little dehydrated--and all of a sudden-- I felt lost. I didn't know where I was on the course--IT DID NOT COMPUTE-- and for a few minutes, I actually thought that everyone else was going the wrong way-- and I thought to myself--COULD I BE THE ONLY ONE WHO KNOWS THE RIGHT WAY? I actually started to panic and yelled to another runner, "Why is everyone going the wrong way?" He must have thought I was NUTS--and I was for just a few minutes--WELL-- THAT'S STILL UP FOR DEBATE IF YOU ASK SEVERAL PEOPLE. Anyways,  my heart started pounding and my breathing became heavier-- until I finally recognized where I was on the course and continued on.  It was very strange but I'm chalking it up to dehydration--the mind can really play tricks on you. This incident reminded me of the book Still Alice by Lisa Genova -- as I had to talk myself out of thinking I had Alzheimer's for quite a while.
First off--I didn't really want to read this book when it first came out because the main character, Alice Howland, is about my age and loves to run. She has run the same streets for several years and starts to  feels disoriented and lost on her runs--at times she can't even remember where she lives. I was afraid to read this book because the reality is that Alice Howland can be ANYONE. Alzheimer's is not selective. Anyways, I finally caved-- read it and I am really glad that I did. I actually learned a lot about the disease, the workings of the brain and the reality of what it does to a family. We all get forgetful with age, but Alzheimer's is different and Genova captures the terrifying reality of being diagnosed with and living with Alzheimer's well. This is a tragic disease that robs a person--the family, friends, in every way imaginable. You owe it to yourself to read this book as it is an honest look at this debilitating disease. I literally could not put the book down--at about 300 pages--a mere 5K--you will be so engrossed that although the pages fly by quickly, the story will stick with you forever.